the art of procrastination

you know procrastination?

I, my friends, am the MASTER of procrastination.

You can try to take the title... but I'm pretty sure I'm the winner.

Not quite sure if I should be proud or ashamed...

Instead of studying, I've been doing some day-dreaming. Let me share what my dreams consisted of:

Shopping. I know, I know. How materialistic of me. Oh well. I like cute clothes ok? It's not like I worship them or anything. I came across this website a couple weeks ago and fell in love. Too bad I am FAR TOO POOR for anything (the "Under $50" section consists of jewelry and adorable outfits for small children). I would like to own one of their dresses someday. So elegant, so sophisticated. So beautiful. I wish every day were a dress up day- like it was in the 50's.

Romance. Not love. Not marriage. Romance. simply someone to like. That would be fun. So would one of these. Dare I say it's been awhile? Cause it has. And it's about time I like someone who likes me back.

Ok so I lied a little. I did dream for a moment about a huge dance party. Aka my wedding reception. It was awesome.

The Open Road. Have you ever wanted to go somewhere sort of by yourself? I have longed for that lately. Like... Really bad. I wish I could get in the car and go. Just drive. Jam out to MY music AS LOUD AS I WANT singing/screaming every word at the top of my lungs. Then arrive to my destination... ideally the beach... sit. read. feel the rays of the sun warming my skin (and burning it-oh well). just... do whatever I please. ugh it would be magical.

And of course... the one thing that is ALWAYS on my mind... GRADUATION! The other day I was thinking about how good it will feel. I cried. For lots of reasons. Thinking of the next few months and how easy, but at the same time hard/stressful, it's going to be is reason enough to cry. However. The fact that I am 5 months away from become a Registered Dental Hygienist is bewildering. Twill be fantastic and I will be throwing a huge party-which you are all invited to.

To sum it all up...

I am a dreamer... who procrastinates.

And I love this song!

sometimes i want to punch certain people in the face.

about 10 minutes ago was one of those times.... and i have to vent.

sometimes a girl gets home from a long long day at school and wants to unwind a bit.

at some point during that unwinding she wants to take a warm. no. a HOT. steaming HOT. consistently HOT shower.

well when someone else (who does NOT need the HOT shower HALF as much as previously mentioned girl) beats said girl to the shower and swears that he will NOT take all the HOT water for her HOT shower and then does exactly what he swore NOT to do....

the outcome is not pretty.

girl gets very. very. very upset. so upset that after the piping HOT water that lasted all of 20 seconds quickly fades to an ice cold shower... she had to rush through her whole "unwinding/relaxation" process... skipping the washing of 90% of her body and a much needed face scrub to remove several layers of dead skin... so upset that she stomped out of the bathroom (need i remind you FREEZING cold), threatened the manhood of said boy who took the hot water, shut her bed room door and cried.

PMS much?

a note on the single life

well... life right now is a bit crazy but not. really it should be crazy. i should be spending every waking moment studying. but i don't. i am officially a slacker.

i kinda hate that i've become such a slacker. years ago when i was dating the only boy/man i've ever dated seriously, i was such a good student. he admired that about me. now i'm terrible. if i were dating someone, would they think i'm awful person because of it? i don't know... just a thought.

remember how a few months ago i posted this... scroll down the post a bit and you'll see in bold italics, "i'm not ready". welp, i take it back. i'm done with the singles scene. now... i will say that i enjoy being able to flirt, however. i would really like to have someone to hold me and say, "hey tori... you're awesome! let me buy you some really yummy food and hold your hand and make all the other little girls at the mall jealous". (that last little part was a dream of mine when i was little... ok fine it still is...) well now that my inner-patheticness is coming to the surface, i would like to tell you i'm not the only one. i have a couple of single friends who have openly admitted to possessing the same feelings, which makes me feel a tid-bit better.

adding to my hate for the single life... boys are stupid. i've discovered that boys/men ranging from ages 21-30 do not date. well, they don't date me anyway. and the ones who decide to ask may be awesome, but aren't for me. maybe i'm too picky? probably. but hey... eternity is eternity.

now to bring my bitter thoughts to a hault...

i went to my dear friend brads house on monday night. as we were laying in the hammock, relaxing, listening to the rustling leaves of the citrus trees we were gazing up at... we started talking about the single life. he said something like...

"some people think that they will be happy when they find that special someone.

when they have someone who will hold them and be there for them always.

but its not true. if you can't be happy on your own, no one else will make you happy.

you have to learn how to be happy by yourself.

i think thats when you'll find the person you're meant to be with."

he's totally 101% correct.

so thats my mission. be happy all by my lonesome. some days i'm good at it. others not so much. its a daily battle that i will have to fight... but i will win!

the end.

ps if you want to keep reading about random things... continue.

-i sort of like this semester a lot ish.... not as bad as i thought... a little more dramatic than past semesters... new coordinators and such make it a little tougher. but merh. i'm not filled with anxiety everyday.

-i love my new carpool (me and christan joined forces with another carpool... no more light rail)! shout out to muh homie who pushes me to update my blog. i love her. creepy confession: i have thought she was adorable since day 1 and i wanted to be one of her hygiene school bffs. and now i am! well, at least i'd like to think so.

-i have friends in my ward. its about time. (from january til about may i would just go to church, sit by myself, and leave... wouldn't talk to peeps at all... but now i do and i love having more friends)

-i'm doing this! and being in a music video for this lovely lady! and hopefully meeting this inspirational woman all in one weekend! i'm stoked!

3rd Semester

dreading my third semester of hygiene school for the following reasons:

• new clinic coordinator... who kind of scares me.
• oral pathology
• anesthesia lab... fun? maybe. terrifying? yes. how can it be both at the same time? good question. i'll find out which word describes my feelings about the lab after the 1st session.
• loooong days... (tuesdays 9 am to 8 pm? wednesdays 9 am to 5 pm? fridays 7 am to 4:30 pm? YUCK!)
• case doc
• possible loss of social life that i've managed to hang on to the last 2 semesters
• friday mornings with an awful dentist
• stress
• probably leaving out a million things...

you know what i say to you third semester?

BRING IT!

My 25 BUCKET LIST:

25 things I hope to do/accomplish BEFORE the marvelous age of 25

BACKGROUND: Before I begin I just wanted to explain why I made this list in the first place. I was making visits with my RS President (oh... ps I was called to be in the RS presidency in my singles ward. so far so good!). Anywho we were talking about ourselves (getting to know this sister in the ward), and Sara (Pres.) said that she had made this list of things she wanted to do by the time she was 30. I decided I wanted to copy her. So I've made a list this weekend while I was on my way to Prescott, AZ with my beautiful friend Darlene. I hope you enjoy reading my hopes/dreams! I can't wait to start! (PS these aren't in any particular order)

1. Grow a garden.
2. Go to South America (I really don't care which country-I just want to go!)
3. Go on a cruise
4. Learn to play the song "Flight of the Bumble Bee" on the piano
5. Learn how to paint! (I've always wanted to try painting. I used to take art in Jr. High. Not gonna lie I had some talent! I would love to give painting a shot.)
6. Earn my Bachelors (when I graduate from Rio I'll just have my Associate's degree. I want to have a Bachelors... so I'm gonna get it!)
7. Return to HAWAII! (whether its for 2 weeks or 2 months. I MUST RETURN!)
8. See an Opera!
9. Go to a Professional Ballet Recital
10. Walk the streets of NYC!!! (I love the downtown feel-and NYC is the epitome of that!)
11. Do Family History work and take the names to the Temple. How amazing will that be? I went to the Temple last week and there were a few people there who did family names. One lady was just so excited to be there and was so happy and proud to be baptized and confirmed for her relatives. I want to be able to do that for my ancestors. =)
12. Learn to play the guitar (at least a few songs). Some of my fondest memories of my cousins on my dad's side are sitting around while they play the guitar/sing-seriously one of my favorite things!
13. Float the Salt River (I know... I'm an AZ native and I've never done it)
14. Take voice lessons
15. Learn Spanish
16. Horse back ride on the beach
17. SCUBA dive (I'll have to really work up to that one... I am a pansie... but Sara inspired me)
18. Sew my very own dress/Sunday get-up
19. Make a quilt (I would love to make one with all of my old t-shirts from high school)
20. Do a 5k or something haha I know thats like... nothing, but I'm not much of a runner as of late. But it would be cool to train for some type of race and do it. I wouldn't be in it for the win (obviously), but for the experience.
21. Swim with dolphins (childhood dream)
22. Get a facial
23. Go to a live recording of a TV show! (preferably So You Think You Can Dance, Tyra, or Ellen D's show)
24. Road trip it up to Utah and go to General Conference
25. Volunteer at a soup kitchen

So there you have it! Some of them are easily done... some not so much. I am excited to be alive!

P.S. HAPPY 4th of JULY!!!!!!